i am awake. i am alive.

By: thelovelylo

Jun 16 2009

Category: God, life, love, tattoos, art and music

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i have gone way too long without writing and now i just have a cornucopia of feelings dwelling inside of me.

i just came back from atlanta for a tattoo convention.
it was pretty lame to be honest.
i remember when that convention was much busier,
but then again, times are tough and it seems that there are a million tattoo conventions these days.

just moved in with vernester and things are going well.
she reminds me of how i was when i was living with taryon… in some aspects.
but in other aspects i am still me. it’s funny having a girl roomie again.
especially as a married person, even though KC isn’t here all the time.
they’re a lot alike in personality… vernester is definitely more talkative.
she reminds me of my mom when we watch a movie. haha!
the living situation is better for KC and i to save money
and it’s encouraging to be living with a fellow believer again.

i went to the healing room for prayer and it was very eye opening.
i got prayer for protection for my marriage, finances and growth.
there is a lot that has been going on and i want to make sure to keep on the path.
it was great! i mean… i felt so much lighter walking out of there.
and honestly, it couldn’t have been a more perfect time. i really needed that.
and God knew that and divinely appointed it.

i got to see my great friend torri in atlanta.
i really miss her. she is such a strong woman of God.
she is doing a lot of things lately that i am super excited for.
i pray that she keeps doing all that God gives her to do…
she is quite a warrior.

and my father is in the hospital.
he has been coughing for a few days and now has pneumonia.
he’s been in the hospital for it twice before, so it’s not like a shock or anything.
they’re giving him antibiotics.
but this time is different.
this time i feel different about the whole thing.
i guess because already this year, two people i know have passed away from something like this.
and i am not saying that i think my dad will do the same, but i am however concerned.

i think that although from time to time i think about my life without my father,
it never really sinks in.
even if i do get upset, it’s still like a movie or a dream to me.

surreal.

but i know it’s very real, and will happen one day.
i just pray that i have more time with my father.
i would like him to see his blood grandchildren.
i would like KC to get to know him more.
i want my own mother to get to know him more as well.
there are so many things that they still have to learn about each other.
it’s funny to say because they’ve been married for over 25 years.

i just pray he’s going to be ok.

i pray that i will be, too.