i am awake. i am alive.

By: thelovelylo

Aug 17 2005

Category: Uncategorized

6 Comments

so, i have been feeling a little stressed lately.
not that i am not stressed all the time…
but it just seems that i am worrying a lot.
more than usual.
i have people that can’t do my shoots… reconcept.
cool.
not cool.
i have a job.
i have to shoot some buildings for a brochure.
like a real paying job doing what i want to do with my life.
wow.
exciting…
and i am nervous.
i need to read more…
i need more time.
i am getting there… it’s just taking longer than expected.
i am praying more, which is great.
and my prayers are being unexpectedly answered.
i never expect everything i pray for
because truthfully i don’t necessarily need all that i pray for.
it’s been good.
but there’s this extra thing that i have kinda… well…
it’s unexpected as well.
sometimes i wonder why he even likes me.
i mean… i dunno…
i guess that’s just me being a girl or something…
but…
maybe i can’t stand to be hurt anymore.
and i don’t want to hurt anyone either.
and maybe that’s why i am scared.
don’t get me wrong… i am actually handling this well.
i’m taking my time… not being impulsive.
yeah.
it’s ok… everything is going ok.
but i am still stressed.

*sigh*

whatever…
i will live.